Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Holy SUPER App Batman!!

So, as many of you know, I am a super freak about ingredients.  I care about ingredients,  where they came from, and the integrity of the source of the product.  Whether it goes in my mouth or on my body, I read the ingredients label, and I look to see where the product was made.  Now, as a busy girl (who is easily swayed by sparkly packaging) there are times that I miss the fine print (like the fact it comes from a third world country with entirely different standards for human consumption).  The pollutants in the environment, coupled with bad water, and a mix of lead paint in the packaging, can all add up to money NOT well spent.  If you have the time to research the brand, that is awesome.  If not, then you should have this app on your phone: Skin Deep, created and launched by the Environmental Working Group (EWG) is hands down, the best beauty companion a girl can have.   

Here is how it works:
Before you buy it, you must scan it!  As you stalk the aisles of the grocery store, drugstore, or Sephora, have your phone out.  Pick the item up, scan the bar code and a “score” will appear on your phone.  The score indicates how dangerous or safe, the scanned product is for you.   You can also read about the score as well, which makes it very user friendly.  If you do not care that the company does not use biodegradable packaging, and therefore, the score (in your opinion) is too harsh, but physically the product is safe, you can make that judgment call in seconds!  Since I have a CVS addiction and peruse the aisles at my 24 hr CVS to kill time at 5 am, I have had the time to find out some really interesting things that I discovered with my app.  

They are as follows:
  • Most “organic” beauty products score very poorly.  The USDA organic seal is only approved for products that meet their acceptable edible food standards.  That’s right kids…the USDA cannot certify anything inedible to be organic.  This means that some of the “ingredients” may be organic, but the product itself is not.  BEWARE BUYING ORGANIC beauty products!  The beauty industry is ripe with nefarious characters looking to charge double for cheaper, lower quality products (and many of the big namers STILL USE ANIMAL TESTING which does not mean they cannot claim "all natural or organic!! Bastards!).
  • La Roche-Posay rocks it across the board.  Almost the ENTIRE collection rates very well and is considered very safe.   I bought the sunscreen and use it as a hand lotion.  LOVE IT.
  • Kiss My Face- One of the best natural brands on the market, DOES NOT score well.  Apparently EWG has issues with the packaging.  Well you know what EWG,  if it’s not going to give me cancer, block my endocrine system, or cause my ovaries to shrivel up and fall out, I’m good ...THANKS.  The products actually work, and I am an ardent fan of the company.

Heed my cautionary tale…you will get super addicted to using this app, and you will start buying items with the lowest score because you are a responsible adult who lives a healthy lifestyle.  Here is the one problem that this type of mentality has, not all products are created equal.  Most of the time, the really clean items, the ones with the lowest scores, JUST DON’T WORK.  For example, I bought a new shampoo and conditioner based solely on scores.  My hair got so tangled from the shampoo and conditioner, that it took me an hour to get a comb it out.  I bought some WILDLY expensive face cream, again based on score, and my face broke out into a rash that it took me 5 months to get rid of ( I literally had to go to the dermatologist). 

Warnings aside, I am a huge fan of EWG and all the work they do to make sure we are not getting the shaft from the beauty industry, well at the very least, we won’t become sterile and die of cancer from our lipstick (unless it’s a really, really good color).

Stay tuned for next month’s post…..

Monday, December 2, 2013

Turnrow has NAILED it!

For those of you who have read my blog, you know that once I find an item.. that I LOVE..not only do I tell you about it so that you can feel the same glee that I do, but I add it to my permanent arsenal.  Currently, those items include:

The Bite Stick- AFTER BITE
Moroccan Oil- The actual brand, not the lame cheaper versions that don't actually work.
Band-Aid Blister Stick
Aveeno waterproof 50 SPF sun spray
Nars the Multiple in Orgasm
Lancome Defencils in Black
Kerastase Hair products- ALL
Color Tattoo eye shadow in bold gold

None of which would help me on a desert island, but who cares..after all..I'm on a freaking deserted island..if it's not just about me and what I want then..when would it EVER be just about me?

Okay..on to the new item.  Of course, as with all of my items there is a back story.  My very good friend H. (the H does NOT stand for heroin for those of you who immediately jumped to the conclusion I meant smack...what's wrong with you?  Really? Going right to Heroin when you see H?)  Anyway, my very good friend is trying to get pregnant.  In her quest she began reading about the many chemicals in our cosmetics, body lotion and hair products that cause infertility though endocrine disruption and making your hormones go all wonky.  After reading about this she began thinking about all of her friends without children and how many of us just simply never got pregnant and the light-bulb went off.  Clearly there is a connection between all these "blockers" and fertility rates.  Immediately she stopped using all of them and went only for the products that were as close to natural that she could get.  However, as anyone who stands next to a hippie at Whole Foods can attest, the all natural stuff doesn't really work. So she did what I still find endlessly heroic, she started her own line (with her equally amazing sister).  The Bath and Home line is called<b> TURNROW Bath, Body and Home.

H. had asked me to test the Sensitive stick because:  A. I have sensitive skin and B. I'm looking for a new moisturizer to transition to since Oil of Olay stopped making mine (bastards.)  It's a tiny little stick with the same consistency as lip balm.  I popped it into my gym bag and the next day after my post workout face- wash I put it all over my face.  I then stepped out into 30 degree blustery winds.  It was AWESOME. My skin didn't get touched. It was as if I had applied a shield.  My use of the product since then has rapidly progressed.  I have used it on my cuticles, my lips and I even used it to tame some fly away's when my bangs were giving me grief.  It is such a miraculous item!  It does not smell (HUGE PLUS) It has multiple, multiple much so..that I recommended they change the name to the EVERYTHING stick.  I think you could use this on basically everything because its sensitive and scent free.

GO TO THE WEBSITE AND BUY THIS STICK.  You will not regret it.  While you are there..check out all the other awesome items these sisters have.  Remember its all natural and the ingredients are available, if you e-mail H or her sister in case of allergies..or curiosity.  Don't muck up your system with chemicals and don't blow WADS of cash on "natural" products that don't work .(Like I did).

Oh! I just thought of another use, you could stick some raffia into the EVERYTHING stick and make a know....for when you are on that desert island!  It just keeps going!

Have a Merry Christmas and Salacious New Years!

Friday, September 27, 2013

Son of a B! (sting)

Hello Pretty People! Miss me?? I have been gallivanting around Washington D.C. and South Carolina, narrowly escaping government shutdowns and furlough days, moving from a very large house to a very small house…all the while pursuing my Master’s Degree. Well I am excited to tell you that I have indeed finished my Master’s and now you have me all to yourselves. Yay! Okay, let’s get down to business and talk about, what is quite possibly, the most awesome product ever purchased from a drugstore. Now , for those of you who know that I spend hours scouring through the local CVS looking for cool new stuff to try, my previous statement should really freaking MEAN something. As we have talked about in the past, I get bitten by mosquitos CONSTANTLY. Not only do I get bitten, but they swell and ITCH like craaaaaazy, making me miserable. The welts get so big and so grotesque, I’m afraid of small children seeing them for fear they will cry. Mosquitos are my nemesis. Clearly. Although we are coming to the end of mosquito season (Holla!!), you still need to know about the gloriousness of this item. I have one in my purse, one in my car, one in my gym bag and one at my house...JUST IN CASE, I get bit. I was in South Carolina (home of the most mosquitos on the planet, you can Google it…you will find out that I am exaggerating, but go ahead, and Google it just to tell me I’m wrong). Point is…I was bitten four times going from the house to the car. My sister in law, also known as Queen of the Holler for her mad country skills, got this stick out and Changed. My. Life. AFTERBITE- The Itch Eraser! Bite Treatments&product=AfterBite®&id=178 You roll it burns like hell…and then the bite STOPS ITCHING. Like Magic! Sweet. Baby. Jesus it’s the BEST. Hey..on another beauty topic,a couple of you have sent me some products to try. Sadly, for one reason or another, I haven’t gotten to them yet. Don’t fear! I will not forget. I actually have a list started. Look for posts about your product next month. Xoxoxo! Lisa

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

WWTD? Not buy his own beauty products I'm guessing..

As a testament to my love of fashion and beauty.. I have a "Beauty" hero that I have followed for eons...but this past month.. my hero fell..and fell hard. Back when I worked retail.. I had a saying taped up on my mirror..and when things got they often did in retail...I would stare at it looking for guidance.. that saying was: "WWTD?" or "What would Tom do?" The Tom of course, being the one and only Tom Ford. Tom Ford was crazy, sexy cool and the leading expert on all things cool.  I held firm to this belief when he quit Gucci and went into movies (anyone see it? me either). I continued to hold him on a pedestal when he dabbled in cosmetics with Estee Lauder (yeah..).  I even went to look at his Sunglasses when he decided sunglass design was his new thing.  However, most recently, he took a step too far...and I was...disappointed.. to say the least.

Tom has a new cosmetics line out.. that has been getting TONS of rock solid reviews from all my favorite beauty editors.   I was reading one review of his new lipstick line (not available in the US) and how it was going to be released in the US at a few  top secret Nordstrom locations only. you all know.. I HAD TO HAVE IT. I researched.. called stores..and found a make up artists as in love with Tom as I was, who gave up the first U.S. location.  I called the day of it's release and ordered the most popular color ( a ruby red) in the line.  $60 for the one tube..but it could have been $160..I was going to have it.  Two weeks little box arrived and I ceremoniously unwrapped it. The casing was a GLORIOUS black onyx and gold.  It was sooo pretty. I sat in front of the tube and just looked at the outside clapping with glee for a few moments  before I decided to unsheathe my prize.  The color, once exposed, was more like a hot pink than a ruby red.. I was confused. I checked the bottom of the container with what I had ordered..they matched. The color in person.. looked nothing like it had in the magazine or on the Nordstrom website. I have never, ever worn a hot pink lipstick in my life.  Hmmm. Maybe it changed colors once it was on? You know, like that lipstick from Wet and Wild in the early 80's?

I cautiously went to the bathroom mirror and applied the lipstick slowly.  It felt smooth, had no smell.. which was good..but the color? OMG the color was AWFUL.  Still not wanting to believe that Tom could make something so hideous.. I went to show my husband.  His expression said it all. "Lisa.. that is the most obnoxious pink I have ever seen. Is it  a joke?" I just walked back in to wipe the lipstick off.   I decided to call the other super fan I had met in my pursuit of the lipstick.. and see what her thoughts were.  She too.. was flabbergasted at how  bad the color was. She told me the whole line was like that. The make-up with the big price tags.. "was like cheap grocery store make-up..the quality is just terrible".  I was so bummed as packaged up my tube to be returned to Nordstroms. 

Later that week..yet another Tom article came out where he was going on and on about his success.  Apparently, he also takes 5 baths a day.  Now.. that's is just weird.  Oh.. and I also read the article twice looking for the part where Tom begs my forgiveness for letting me down and creating such a crappy product. No such luck.  Boo.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Seriously, I'm like a Raccoon! Well...a very happy raccoon...

I  read somewhere that Raccoons love things that sparkle.  They are easy to catch if you put something sparkly or something that glitters next to a trap.  Unable to help themselves...they get drawn into the irresistible shimmer and sadly, get snared into their inevitable demise. I am very much like a raccoon in that sense.  I just can't help myself when it comes to anything glitters, shimmers or sparkles, whether it be clothes, make-up,body lotion or even soap (yes LUSH has a glitter bath bomb I couldn't pass up). 

However after perusing the holiday make up lines this year, I know that I am not alone!  Every major line offered something in their collection that spoke to my inner glamour party princess, that girlie girl that leaps up and down with excitement while externally, I try to keep it cool and make the purchase.  I have one new purchase though that knocked off this summer's shimmer lotion as my new favorite Crush item.  Galaray, my stunning hair dresser and fellow glamour maven told me about this after I saw her wearing it and went..ohhhh.. ahhh..  what do you have on your eyes!!

MAC Superslick Liquid Liner in PURE SHOW.  This stuff is pure gold glitter awesomeness.  Now, I should tell you that I am not very good at doing tricky things like applying black liquid liner, or doing false eyelashes. I usually end up getting frustrated and throwing it all in the trash.  Not this liner!  It is so easy to apply and adds a bunch of drama!  Try it you will love it!

Sadly, after all my searching and trying, that was the only item that I felt was worth writing about.  Most of the shimmer/glitter/sparkle products, I already have, or were the wrong colors for me entirely. I urge you to get out there, look for yourself and add some shimmer to your sizzle this holiday season!

Now for the bad... remember when I told you guys to NOT BUY FINGERNAIL POLISH? 

Well, because I am a raccoon, I was unable to pass this one up.. but darn it if I shouldn't have! 
Nicole by OPI Holiday 2011 Collection: Ornament For Each Other.

This nail polish stopped me in my tracks as I sashayed through Wegman's one early Saturday morning.  I hmm'd and haw'd.. knowing that I had decided to stop buying nail polish.  Committed, I left the bottle, and continued shopping, only to head back in under 2 minutes.  I do not  have much self control.  The color was gorgeous..and for $8 bucks.. what the hell?  I left the store, went home and made an appointment for a mani-pedi. 

That afternoon, I showed my nail lady the new color and she too did the whole.. ohhhh...awww.. "pretty!" and then we both giggled with excitement...true story.  However, 45 minutes later, as she was trying to apply the color, she got this odd look. Not a good look either.  More like a "how do I tell my client her polish sucks" look.  I looked at my big toe and saw the problem.  The polish was going on sheer, and streaky.  Many, many coats would have to be applied to get the same color as the bottle. 

Here's the problem with that.. when you apply glitter polish, it has a tendency to chunk and become clumpy.  So, you have to apply it slowly, one coat dries... you apply the second..and so on sometimes going as high as 8 or 10 coats.  Even if you have the money, time and patience for this ritual.. the glitter polish has a tendency to chip off as early as the next day because its so thick.!  DO NOT BUY THIS NAIL POLISH.  SAVE YOUR $8 BUCKS FOR GINGERBREAD or EGGNOG LATTE'S.

Okay friends, that's it for December.. remember to exfoliate and moisturize all over for the next few months at least once a week!  Promise?  If you have any Questions or are searching for a specific item to cure your winter blues...e-mail me at  I will do my best to answer you quickly.

Have a happy holiday season, an even better New Year, and remember to let someone know they are beautiful...when they least expect it. 

Love you! 

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

HOLIDAY SHMOLIDAY! Where is my new stuff!!??

Every “Holiday Season” (the holiday season starts in November in fashion magazine land) I anticipate the new “got to have it” item that everyone is raving about.  So you can imagine when, after sorting through my normal stack of magazines, my disappointment when nothing really stood out.  Essentially it was just a bunch of the same ol’ things…New eye shadow…New blush…New lipstick...that all look remarkably like the ones from last holiday season (sparkle here…purple there...blah, blah, blah).

Don’t be sad, I have not given up the search.  I will simply have to go to the make up counters in person to see the new goods up close and personal.  Until I have the chance to take that field trip, I will tell you about an item I found in September (pre-holiday season) that I LOVE!  


Quiet…listen…Do you hear the music playing in the background every time you say the name of this product?  It’s just that magnificent…it has its own theme music.  Plantscription serum does everything it promises. My skin is so nice; I no longer wear tinted moisturizer.  I only wear blush!  It is AMAZING!  Ask the girl at the counter for a sample.  If there are no samples, then just make the investment.  You won’t regret it. 

WORST PRODUCT NEW PRODUCT EVER! remember when I said that there was nothing exciting in the magazines, well…there was an ad for a new Laura Mercier crème eye shadow stick and y’all know how crazy in love I am with the NARS crème eye shadow and the Laura Mercier tinted moisturizer…so clearly it was a new product I had to have.  So much so, that I asked my lovely hair dresser to walk over to Nordstrom and see if was in stock yet. (She is that awesome).  As soon as my hair was done, I ran to the make up girl at Nordstroms and bought two sticks.  The next morning, I applied the stick and thought...hmm it’s a little dark...kind of Goth.  

That night when I went to wash it off , it would NOT COME OFF.  I’m not kidding... the damn make-up wouldn’t budge.  So…I used my “eye make up remover”...still no luck.  Tired... I gave up and went to bed.   This went on for three days!!!  The original dark gothic green dulled slightly with each day to resemble an aging bruise, but that was it, it was still clearly there.  This crème eye shadow appeared to be semi-permanent.  Something I feel they should have told you when you were buying the product.  

Unless you are a 20 year old club kid who frequents Goth bars every night, DO NOT BUY THIS PRODUCT...IT’S AWFUL.


Okay... now you have the good and the bad for November.  Stay tuned for December …the fruits of my Holiday product scavenger hunt will be on full display! Gobble Gobble!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

I love my Ta-Ta's!!

Clearly, I’m talking about my boobs.  Now, they are not what you would call “Porn” hot.  Honestly, they probably aren’t even “Real Housewives” hot.  But I love them just the same.  They are perfect to me and I think as far as boobs go...I got pretty lucky.  Now you may wonder why my beauty blog is starting off with self adulation about my glorious rack, but if you have picked up any kind of fashion magazine in October, you know it’s breast cancer awareness month.  It’s important to do your self exams and more important to get your mammograms…but beauty products are very important here too.  

I was talking with a friend whose wife just finished her last round of chemotherapy after a year long battle with breast cancer.  It was during that discussion that he told me the  cause of the type of breast cancer she has is “Environmental”.  This made me remember that when my Dad was diagnosed with Lung and colon cancer they asked to see all of his “grooming” products.  Ladies and are the cold hard facts: Beauty can kill.  Maybe not right away…but over a long period of time and with consistent exposure…your beauty routine could give you cancer.  

I know… it’s a bummer.  However, many eons ago, I found this great website called: The Environmental Working Group (EWG) for short.  They have a data base of many beauty products.  Now, before I try a new product, I check it in the data base.  If it has cancer causing ingredients, I don’t buy it.

Here is the website:

Just to give you an example of what they offer let’s look at facial cleansers:

The best scoring product, Coastal Classic Creations Exfoliating cleanser..scores a 0/10.  That means that there are no environmental risks should you use this everyday.

The worst scoring product, John Allen's Scrub and Exfoliating cleanser..scores a 9/10!
Not only is there a risk of cancer after long term use, but it also is very high in endocrine disruption, which effects your fertility!  Crazy right!?

So here is what I recommend, look at the products you use everyday.  Go to this website and make sure you aren’t using anything that can hurt you over long term exposure.  I use 17 products everyday..and not one scores above a 5.

Friends- PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!... Pay attention to everything that goes in your mouth, on your skin, or in your hair.  Cancer Sucks!  Protect the boobies…and every other part of you… today and for many years to come.